On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
