If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
