He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
