Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Two words: nipple clamps
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