Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Randomize
