Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize