i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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