we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Randomize
