I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
