When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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