...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize