i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
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