Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Randomize
