Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
