his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
