I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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