I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
