On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
Quick, to the slutcave!
what day is it and did you see me today?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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