i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize