please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
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