garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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