Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
