Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
being pregnant is like rehab
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
