yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
