apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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