I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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