Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
