All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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