you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
