I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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