Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize