The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
