Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
