do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I'm really into asian looking animals
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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