I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
This is classic penis vs brain.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize
