you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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