Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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