Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
