Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
