Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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