OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Farmville is her only friend.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
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