my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
