Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
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