you guys were way drunker than both of me
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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