See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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