He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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