K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
