ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
3pm strippers are depressing
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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