There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
