I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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