my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I just found puke in my bra..
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
